The Solidity of Air

 Mind is as solid as air. There. It has been said (or typed, actually). If you read my previous post on types of thinking, this shouldn't come as a surprise that I would have to write something like this. The suggestion that we are not our thoughts is heretical to many people. But the more you dig, the more you come to find out that this is true. Thinking that you are an identity is just as delusional as thinking that air is a duck. 

These statements aren't just philosophical. They are words that come from a lifetime of quieting the conditioned mind and hearing what is, rather than what is not. What is is beyond words. It can't be described nor can it be discussed. You either know it or you don't (though many people have a sense about it). Those who know it, know they don't know it. Those who don't know it, say they know it. It is beyond any notion one can think of. Therefore it has no weight nor form. It is neither humble nor loud. It just is. 

Types of thinking, from my previous post, are just ways people live their lives. Quieting the conditioned mind and waking up is realizing that you don't have to be so narrow while living your life. It is the great surrendering to life that most people find terrifying. But they only find it terrifying because they have objectified what it is to surrender. The surrendering is not an act of bravery. It is just an act. For those who are terrified of it though, it is considered the warrior's path. But when the person has truly surrendered, they don't identify as a warrior. 

This is why mind is as solid as air. You can grasp at it all you want, but you never really seem to get anything out of it. 

Identity as a Type of Thinking

 Identity has been going on for about as long as humans have had memory. Way back when there weren't any major civilizations, people formed tribes and other types of groupings. The varying tribes/groupings identified themselves through various means as a way to keep their people safe. For instance, maybe your tribe wore your hair in one way and a different tribe wore theirs in another way. Depending on what their hairstyle was, you could either see them as enemy or friend. This is just one simple example, of course. 

As time has gone on, identity has become more diverse the bigger the population in a given culture. Now, identity involves, skin color, clothing style, gender, color of skin, political allegiance, to name a few. In America, we teach that people are these identities instead of the practice that identity thinking is just one form of thinking. This causes a lot of feelings of isolation and mental illness as people are misinterpreting how they are thinking as well as how others think. This also produces an us versus them mentality as it is still relegated to the part of the brain related to fight or flight. 

When we realize that identity thinking is just one form of thinking, we realize we can have a lot more flexibility with how we see the world. Identity thinking is just like any other type of thinking. When you are thinking of things in a literary way (like a publisher or author), you look at things such as character development, story, plot, etc. When you think spatially (as like being in construction), you think in terms of depth, width, height, etc. Same with identity thinking. When you deal with identity thinking, you think in terms of how the world makes sense in a way that fits your identity. The difference between identity thinking compared to other forms of thinking is the amount of insistence suggesting we are those thoughts instead of like anything else where we think those thoughts. The carpenter doesn't think they are width or height. The author doesn't think they are the plot. 

We all tend to connect with certain types of thinking and that is great! It is when we think we ARE the content of that thinking that we practice what the Buddha said is dukkha (the illusion of thinking that we are our thoughts). Connecting with certain types of thinking can be almost spiritual in nature. It is like connecting to something bigger than yourself. 

I know this post won't be a popular post as it goes against so much of what we are taught from birth. But it has to be put out there as some people are ready to hear it.

Edit: I watched a video and wanted to share it as part of this post as I think this relates highly to this topic. Here goes: Your brain hallucinates your conscious reality | Anil Seth - YouTube

The Art of Being Offended (Part 1)

 I really think we are looking at the whole "being offended" thing the wrong way. Generally speaking, being offended means that we see something and then have a discomforting experience based on our perceptions of what we saw and then react by either demanding that reality to stop or by lashing out and attacking it. Both responses are based in the same area of the brain that causes the fight or flight response and so no matter how people respond, they are still escalating their own intensity. And once they do this, they are also escalating the environment they are in. Many people will have wonderful explanations for why they are offended and can even make some compelling arguments. But in the end, they are still responding with fight or flight behavior and thus continuing a cycle of reactionary living. 

And don't get me wrong: I think having a sense of being offended is what makes us human. I am offended everyday by the parochial mentality of so many people I interact with. I am also offended by the fact that as a culture we make someone's wealth the measurement of their value. And the list could go on and on. But you almost never hear me talking about it. Because there is no reason to. I use these reactions as learning tools to help equip my mind to stay sharp and interact with a world, that by and large, is unaware of itself. 

We can retrain ourselves to act in a more emotionally regulated manner though! Aha! You can exercise those demons! Exposure is good but is not always the best place to start. I say that because, like anything else, putting oneself into the same situations with the same mindset is not conducive for promoting flexible behavior. 

The first place to start is within. Practice quieting the mind on the whole. It only takes about 15-30 minutes a day to do this. Find a quiet place where you can sit and let the mind just "be" without attaching to thoughts. Sounds easy, right? Nope! In this fast-paced world, quieting the mind is a fairly difficult task. Or like an old friend once said: It is simple, not easy. Once you sit in this quiet place, just sit. That's it. If your mind starts to wonder, bring it back to the present moment. If the mind starts to make impressions about your surroundings, bring it back to the present moment. If you start planning on things you want or need to do later, bring it back to the present moment. If you start to question whether or not it is working, bring it back to the present moment. You are probably starting to see a pattern here: Stay in the present moment. That is literally all you have to do. 

Once you have done this for a couple months, you can begin to expose yourself to things that you would normally be offended by. Perhaps watch a news outlet that you have been emotionally opposed to and watch a segment. While you are watching, be aware of how you are forming your thoughts and reactions, cognitive and emotional. Try not to get attached to them, just watch how they ebb and flow. The first few times is usually the hardest. But with practice, you will find that you can watch almost anything without being too attached to your responses. 

At this point, you might be asking "why do I need to do this" or "what good will this do"? And my answer is very simple, you don't need to do it. You don't need to do anything I suggest. But I have found learning to not get upset, or at least reducing how much I get upset, allows me to be in better control of myself during more stressful times and handle social situations with more grace than before. It's definitely not acting like you don't have feelings or don't respond to things. It's more like responding with dignity. It also offers the other person the space of having their own dignity, which makes it possible to have civil discourse. What you usually find is that you and the other person have more in common when you can have civil discourse.